POEM OF THE MONTH

WRITERS OF THE WORLD UNITE

This is certain to be the most clueless advertisement that I have ever read. I do not know who their marketing person is (or one hopes, for the sake of the publication, was...) but what ethereal planet are they are orbiting, or inhaling? Smells like something green and illegal from BC (No, I don't do spark or anything like that. My greatest vices are chocolate and white tea but not together). Here is the text in its entirety and my further comments afterwards.

"In today's strange social and economic times, it's essential that we take care of ourselves and each other - whether it be through our health regimes, our careers and finances, our relationships, or the wonderful food in our pantries. How do we create happiness from the inside out? Our website is dedicated to searching for those answers. We're a new yet rapidly growing blog/social networking website dedicated to bringing holistic health and wellness to people everywhere through insightful, funny, compassionate, and informative articles. If you're a college student, graduate student, stay-at-home mom seeking a little "me" activity, or anyone else looking for intern experience in new media, then we'd love to hear from you! We're seeking both Marketing and Editorial interns (or those who enjoy both), who can lend us a few hours a day, a few days a week. While there is no outright compensation, we make it a point to reward a job well done -- we've done the unpaid intern thing ourselves, so we know full well how to appreciate them! We'd love to hear from potential interns with social media experience. Ideally you have a strong profile and network on sites such as Digg, Reddit, StumbleUpon and Delicious, and be an avid consumer of and participant in the blogosphere...but you know what? Even if you don't have these things, we'll teach you! Don't worry about traditional cover letters...those are quite boring. Just tell us why you'd like to be a virtual intern, how many hours a week you could spare, and what interests you as a writer or reader! Thanks so much! Have a Peaceful Day."

I hope a hurricane wipes this company from the globe. Have a happy day! The false sense of camaraderie that the advertiser tries to build with the first lines about the rough times and how we must all stick together is nauseating. I prefer an advertiser who has specific business needs and states these goals in a matter-of-fact statement. Skip the cutesy stuff, just tell me what you need for writing services and how much money you offer. This false lifeboat of New Age marketing jargon is abusive towards people who are struggling to find work for their survival in a tough economy.

What irritates me most about this classified is that any self-respecting stay at home mum who was looking at adverts on the Web would be searching for a pay cheque attached to a job, not a "little me activity". The writers of this ad treat women if they are second class citizens who do not want to be employed or who are not, like single moms I know, breadwinners in their own right. I agree with Harlan Ellison's rant about those parasites who expect a writer to feel oh-so-grateful for a free interview or an unremunerated internship. He believes that writers should not give their content away for free or for the lowest pay and that those skinflints who desire unpaid internships or 400 words for 40 articles a day at $.01 a word should go take a long walk off a short pier over a piranha infested river.

I think, as writers, we are obligated to starve the penny-pinchers out of the publishing market. Refuse to take jobs that pay less than minimum wage. Let their businesses fail without our work. The companies do not have our talents and will go under without us. They will only have our competent labour if they reward us with decent wages. The other side of the coin is to do well for those companies who value their writers and pay decent wages and who, in other terms, act professional. Those flighty buggers who continue to live in this fantasy world where moms want a little me activity and not a paycheque will only get the worse of the lot, if that.

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